What I’m Reading This Month (April)

April 18, 2013 by Christin 3 Comments

These are the books I’m working through this month…

Heartfelt Discipline: Following God’s Path of Life to the Heart of Your Child

This has been an excellent read. Breaking down the walls of specific types of parenting and teaching parents how to be lead by the Spirit to train, correct, and discipline their children. I’m absolutely loving it.

“True biblical discipline is about much more than simply controlling a child’s behavior. It’s about shaping the heart, which is why sympathy is such an integral part of heartfelt discipline.” -Clay Clarkson, Heartfelt Discipline

Beyond Survival: A Guide to Abundant-Life Homeschooling

This book lays out a solid foundation for homeschooling. Practical ways to help you build a firm homeschooling structure.

“It’s essential to begin the building of our children’s educational ‘house’ with a blueprint, a specific plan, an educational philosophy. The blueprint is the educational approach you use in teaching your children. It is the format you use to present information.” -Diana Waring, Beyond Survival

Beautiful Battle: A Woman’s Guide to Spiritual Warfare

There’s no doubt there is a battle raging over here as we wrap up the end of our adoption process. I have grazed some of this book in the past, but I think there is no better time to pull it out then now.

“Spiritual warfare has more to do with the state of your heart before a holy God than a list of things to do or avoid. It involves interaction, sometimes confusion, falling down, getting back up. It involves your willingness to look foolish, to take crazy steps, to trust God’s voice. While there are principles to know and practice, it’s your ability to trust in God’s power and authority that will bring about the victorious life.” -Mary DeMuth, Beautiful Battle

Still finishing…

The Connected Child

Abundant Simplicity

eBooks

Embracing Beauty: Practical Style for Every Shape and Season of Motherhood

On Becoming a Writer: What Every Blogger Needs to Know

My goals might be a bit high, but we’ll see. I’m not doing virtual assistant work anymore, so I do have a bit more time on my hands…and having a quite time with my children in the afternoon while we all read quietly is time well spent, I’d say! Thirty minutes of reading, for me, is quite a few pages of a book.

What are you reading this month? I’m always looking for new titles to dive into!

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my full disclosure here.

Filed Under: Resources

When the Ground is Dry

April 17, 2013 by Christin 10 Comments

God has been speaking heavily to me about many things lately. I’ve been really good about emptying myself into everything in front of me, but have failed to go to Christ consistently so He can fill me again.

Living my day to day life, always on the look out for the next lesson, has made me weary and quite parched. I’m tired of it and my blog is growing stagnant as a result. My blog was created to share the joys of life and learn to be sensitive to the Spirit through my writing, for me, and anyone else who happened to come across it.

But lately, I feel like it’s more of a place to write only when I have learned some new life lesson. As a result, it’s sitting for days with nothing written on it. Yet I am bursting with words I’d love to share, that maybe don’t reveal all the answers of a problem I may be struggling with.

For 10 days my family dealt with a nasty stomach virus. It put two of my children out of commission (aka sleeping on the couch) for a full SIX days. It also knocked my husband out of work for two straight days. When everyone was finally healthy again, we woke up to a flooded basement. First time in five years of living in this house we have ever encountered 3+ inches of water in our basement.

I was already so exhausted, I thought I might cry.

The mounting distress felt like an attack. Whether or not it was, it could still be used in favor of the enemy if we allowed it. We could grow weary and lose heart.

We could become so distracted by our circumstances that we forget to pray, forget to praise, forget to remember He is good.

During the clean up process, God really equipped me to focus on what was right in front of me by helping me let go of other things. While that didn’t negate the fact that I was emotionally, spiritually, and physically tired, He helped me push through.

The next stage of our adoption process is nearly underway, and this particular stage is one of two major hurdles we have to get through before we can bring our two daughters home. It’s a part of the process that will require specific prayer and a bit of warfare. Satan hates adoption because he hates redemption. He likes things broken. He likes people broken. He will use whatever means necessary to keep them broken.

Using life’s unexpected turns is one way to distract us from praying and warring our girls home. Because I’ll be honest…between the sickness and the basement flood, I haven’t had much fight left in me. My energies were spent focused on what was in front of me physically, rather then the unseen, spiritual warfare coming.

The ground I walk upon has been dry because I haven’t been visiting with the Giver of Life to quench my thirst and fill me again. I’m literally running on empty, on fumes, and am not being a life-giver to those around me. I never thought I’d find myself in this place, to be honest.

I think what happens is it creeps in and you don’t realize it until you have nothing left.

I’ve been slowly digging into Colossians 3 using the Thirty Days of Bible Study for Busy Moms put out by Doorposts. I absolutely love how Pam Forster set up this study and it’s simple enough to replicate to create my own studies. But my mind has been such amuck that I’ve struggled to even concentrate for a few minutes on Bible study. All I can think about is what I need to do and it robs me.

So, I’m letting go of all the “have to’s” and replacing them with what I need to do.

I need to spend regular time with God.
I need to spend consistent time with my children.
I need to be praying for my new daughters as they get ready to come home from Africa.
I need to be reading to learn how to help transition our new daughters into a new family, new culture, new life.

I believe God brings us through seasons, and just because we move into a new season does not mean the previous season was not God’s will. It’s very likely that season was needed in order to move us into the next season. The key is to move when He calls us to move.

Is there some “have to” thing in your life sucking you dry that you need to release in order to make room for what you need? Is God moving you into a new season?

Linked with

Life in Bloom

Filed Under: Daily Life

God Uses the Inadequate

April 10, 2013 by Christin 8 Comments

We got word this week that we are ready to move into the next major step of our adoption. This is one of the longest expected waits before we can bring our girls home. The news was exciting amidst the cloud covering of sickness we’ve all been experiencing here. It was a bit of a refreshing to hear some good news.

The day we received the news, I had trouble sleeping that night. I couldn’t help but think of how hard it might be for these precious girls to leave behind all they know and move to an unknown land. We may know this in the best interest of their future, but they don’t see through that lens. I honestly don’t know yet what lens they are looking through. We know a tiny piece of their history, but I don’t know what that looks like through their eyes.

And I can’t help but think, “How can I possibly do anything to help these girls adjust to such a huge change?” They hardly know me! What makes them think they can trust me after dealing with loss in their own life? How do they really feel about having us pull them from everything they know; even if it isn’t ideal?

Who am I? Who am I to think I can do anything to help these two girls grow and thrive in a new culture with a new family? I am nobody with no special skills. Heck, sometimes I don’t even think I can adequately care for and raise the children I have. I am overwhelmed at the thought of trying to comfort girls who will see me as a stranger to them.

Will what we have to offer be enough to turn around the loss and trauma, even if relatively small, they’ve experienced in their short time on earth?

Simply put, no.

No, I do not have enough to give. No, I will not be enough. No, I do not have the skills that some professionals have to understand how a child’s past effects them. I do not fully understand all the neurological effects that lack of attachement, loss, or trauma cause to the human brain, thus making it more difficult to function in a society “normally.”

I am not enough.

But God?

God is more than enough. He is able to pull my new daughter’s out of miry clay and set their feet upon the Rock. A saying that once was so cliche to me suddenly has new meaning.

He can use my husband and I, and even our children, to meet the very difficult needs of two precious girls He cherishes.

I cannot do anything without his equipping. Anything they need He can provide to them through whatever means He deems necessary. For a season, it looks as if He will be using us. All I need to do is be open and ready and willing.

I can rest knowing that God didn’t call me to do this because He thought I was adequate. He called simply because I was willing.

It’s a scary thing to be willing. But I have no greater peace being exactly where God wants me.

More on how He’s called me to simplify, next week.

Filed Under: Adoption

The Incredible Privilege of a Mother

April 8, 2013 by Christin 5 Comments

Sick Season my husband with our 4-year old in the ER

The last 5 days have been filled with sickness here. The type of sickness that keeps you on your toes. When one child after another catches it and there is little rest for anyone. While I’m caring for the one or two children currently sick, I stay on edge waiting for the next child who will get it. It’s especially hard at night because I don’t sleep, and neither do the children who are up sick all night.

These are incredibly tough seasons. Short, but tough. There is little else you can do other than take care of sick children because their need for mom escalates. So the house is left undone and meals are simple or take out. We become confined to the house to keep our germs to ourselves and rest to get well. It’s certainly my least favorite thing about the winter/spring seasons.

But, to be the one my children reach their hands out to for a comforting touch, to be the one who rubs the back of my sick child to comfort them in a most uncomfortable state, that is a privilege. There is no one who can comfort quite like a mother (or father). This is an opportunity to build an incredible connection with our children.

It’s an opportunity to be OK with letting the house go, letting the stress go, and just be still with your children, at a time in their young childhood when they need you most. These are the things they will remember.

I admit, it wasn’t until this sick season I am learning to embrace these moments. I always found it dreadful. It disrupts our schedule, it disrupts our comfort. Who likes that?

This year, sickness lead to some interesting conversations about God answering prayer. My six year old son, through tears, said he kept praying to God to feel better, but God wasn’t answering his prayer. As a mother, how do you respond to that? My husband and I both had a short, simple talk with our son about this.

We told him that God doesn’t always answer our prayers the way we expect that He will. That even if he does not feel better right now, God has not left him and He is there to comfort him.

Likewise, my ten year old brought up a very similar conversation with me about praying that she would not catch the germ because she has a fear of throwing up. I explained to her that God designed our bodies to function a certain way and that throwing up is not actually a bad thing, but a good one because our body is trying to rid itself of toxins. So, even if she got sick, it doesn’t mean that God didn’t hear her prayer or not answer her, but rather, that there is simply a different way then we would prefer.

How do we respond when we don’t get things the way we want them? Stop believing in God? Stop thinking Him good and the One who knows best? No. We respond with the opportunity to trust Him, and we pass this teaching down to our children. Enduring through a seasonal illness may not seem so big to us adults who understand there are worse things in life. But for a child who has yet to see and experience even some of what we have experienced, an illness can seem like a big deal.

These are one of the many moments that help build and shape our children’s faith. This is where we as mother’s have the ability to teach our children something important and true about God and His character. These are the moments that will later shape our children into who they will become based on their own identity in Christ.

This is how God uses mothers in such a crucial and unique way. We have the privilege of being a great comfort to our children, and a spiritual shaper of how they view God, according to His word. And it starts with small seasonal illnesses.

Don’t take the sick season for granted. Turn it into opportunity.

That’s what God is teaching me this week.

Have you ever considered turning a dreadful season into one of opportunity?

Filed Under: Mothering

Raising Children in a Changing Culture

April 2, 2013 by Christin 7 Comments

Our culture has been in a paradigm shift for some time, but because it is changing so slowly, it is hardly noticeable by many people. Some of the changes happening as of late aren’t necessarily bigger in stature compared to other things, rather, the changes have a lot more attention surrounding them.

The culture shift beckons that we shift with it because we need to be more open and accepting. People make the mistake of believing that when we don’t agree with their choices that we think them lesser people. God has set an important moral standard for His people, and obviously if one is not living for God, they are not going to follow His standards. That’s totally their choice and they’re certainly free to choose.

That’s in large part where this major shift is originating from. People in the higher ups are simply not living for God therefore godly convictions will not spill out into major decisions made on behalf of the country. Christians are now put in a very different and difficult place. Raising our children with “good morals” is no longer clearly defined because our culture has made “good” relative. What is “right” is no longer defined by God through His word, but by what is right in each person’s own eyes (Judges 17:6).

This leaves me, as a mother, in a awkward place. I didn’t expect to raise children in such chaotic times; as confusion sweeps our land. It forces that we teach our children something beyond the law of morality. Because the law of morality is not strong enough to uphold our children in a culture that has such varying opinions on what is considered moral. God’s standard should still be how we live. And His moral still stands. But how do we raise our children with strong convictions and to not compromise?

They must know Christ. They must understand the cost for sin. They must understand the Gospel and how it’s relative to them, individually. Without this connection and relationship, the moral law to them will be quite useless. Just another set of someone else’s standards to follow amongst the many already out there. There is no God like Jesus. He’s the only one who can save people from sins. He’s the only God who lives today.

Knowing Christ gives our children reason to want to follow God’s moral law. Culture today says we need embrace diversity but that doesn’t mean we need to compromise what God lays down as Truth. We can still embrace people without compromise.

I have illustrated the Gospel for my children in several different ways. Children as young as five could understand these concepts to at least some degree.

One way I have illustrated is by choosing two children to make up a scenario. I say, “Say someone gets caught doing something they shouldn’t, but the another person offers to take their punishment as a gift of grace and mercy to them.” This helps my children understand how Jesus took the punishment for our sin. Often I will use their own siblings as an example that is very direct for them.

The other illustration I use can be done on a chalk board, white board, or even a piece of paper. I draw a river or a canyon. I put “GOD” on one side and “PEOPLE” on the other. In the river or canyon I write “SIN”. I explain the sin in our lives kept us from being able to reach God on the other side. But, when Jesus died on the cross, He created a bridge in order for us to cross over to the other side.

Both of these illustrations explain two important aspects of the Gospel: 1)Jesus paid the punishment for our sin. 2)Before Jesus’ death and resurrection, our sins separated us from God, but now we can be in communion with Him.

To reject God and all that is good is to refuse to cross the bridge. The Gospel message is not about living the perfect life, where everything goes the way we want. It’s about living in relationship to God and trusting Him with our lives.

Along with knowing the Gospel, seeing God at work in and around their lives is a huge testimony to His promises.

Teaching our children the moral law is never enough. They need to understand why it’s important to keep it written on their hearts and live it out. They need to understand there is a God who loves them more than anything and His law is to protect them and help them live a better life. God sets the standard for what is right and good and no one else.

Understanding who God is is pertinent to desiring to follow His moral standards and not chase after their own.

Linked with: Titus 2sday

Filed Under: Raising Children

Inviting Our Children Into Our Journey

April 2, 2013 by Christin Leave a Comment

I’m over at Sarah Mae’s sharing about the gifts God has given us and how they’re woven throughout our lives, including our mothering. Being a mom does not make up the whole of our identity. It is a piece of the whole — Christ is our identity and when we embrace that, His character can overflow into every aspect of our lives. Read more here…

Filed Under: Mothering

Battling the Gimmies: Raising Financially Responsible Children

March 27, 2013 by Christin 5 Comments

Today I have a sweet friend sharing some tips on how to battle the gimmies in our children. Please welcome Nancy from There is Grace!

…

It all went down right there in aisle 7: Boy sees toy. Boy wants toy. Mom says “no.” Boy throws a colossal fit that melts Mom into a puddle of frustrated humiliation.

We’ve been doing this dance for decades, us and our children.
No matter how many toys are scattered in the playroom or around the yard at home, my children will always want the shiny new one they see right then. It’s an ongoing battle with the “gimmies.”

The “gimmies” is what I call that have-to-have-it-now attitude that dominates my offspring in any retail setting. Who are we kidding, I struggle with it as much as they do; I simply have enough control to not throw myself into a full-blown tantrum in the middle of Target.

It’s a constant struggle in our age of marketing overload. So, what is a parent to do?
Here’s how we approach it in our family: Money = work.

When kids associate money with work, they are less likely to develop a sense of dis-contentment that can lead to the “gimmies.” In his article, “Teaching Your Kids About Money,” financial guru Dave Ramsey says, “Kids need to make an emotional connection between work and money at a young age.”

Following Ramsey’s advice, we created a list of jobs around the house. A dollar amount was assigned to each job, and whoever does the work gets the money. The jobs and payments are age-appropriate for our 5- and 8-year-olds. For example “feeding the dog” (a daily activity) will earn you $.25 but “raking the leaves” (a once-a-year chore) will bring in $3!

As they grow older, the jobs will grow more difficult and the pay will increase. We record their earnings on a chart throughout the week and tally them up on “payday.”

Give, Save, Spend

We made three simple jars labeled: GIVE, SAVE, SPEND. (Get a free printable here to help you create your own jars.) When the kids earn money, they divide it between the three jars. “The concepts of spending and giving help develop problem-solving skills,” explains Ramsey. “You’re laying a foundation for their lives.”

GIVE. As Christians, we believe in the biblical principle of tithing, so our kids are expected to put at least 10% in the give jar when they are paid. (We help the little ones who don’t know percentages yet.) On Sundays they empty their GIVE jars and take their tithes to church. If we want our kids to have a realistic view of finances, we must teach them to be givers as well as savers and spenders.

SAVE. We encourage our kids to put at least 40% in their save jars. This money is set aside for bigger items they want that mom and dad are not planning to buy. (Mom is not paying an extra $15 for a name-brand label!). They each choose the item they want to save for, and we print a picture to put by their SAVE jar.

SPEND. The balance goes into the SPEND jar. They can take this money with them when we go to the store for something small they might want on a whim.

To our surprise, our kids have consistently chosen to put most of their earnings in their SAVE jars and have already made some great purchases. It’s helped to curb the “gimmies” that strike in the toy aisle, too. Instead of having a meltdown over a desired toy, we simply add it to the “save for” list.
While we have not banished the “gimmies” in our house, we have managed to gain a little ground in the battle. More importantly, we are striving to raise financially responsible children who will one day become hard-working adults who can manage their resources responsibly.

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it” ~Proverbs 22:6

Nancy is a lover of words and all things chocolate. She is married to her best friend, and when she’s not settling sibling squabbles between her Little Miss and Little Man, she can be found sipping coffee and writing about faith, family, and finding grace in the journey. She blogs at There Is Grace.

Filed Under: Guest Posts, Raising Children

The Joy of Motherhood is in the Cross

March 25, 2013 by Christin 1 Comment

Today fellow blogger, KM, is sharing some beautiful truths about motherhood and the cross.
…

Tiny hands grabbing your finger, your child’s first smile, the wobbly first steps, the first tiny kisses, watching your kids sing in a Christmas pageant, celebrating an “A” on a tough test, holding them when they fall down and hurt themselves, magical band-aids, whispered bedtime prayers, and a bouquet of weeds brought in from a summer day.

Don’t these moments bring you joy?

All of these moments are tender, happy, and precious. They’re fleeting. They’re moments to treasure, cherish, and hide in our hearts.

Or maybe you’re having a hard time finding joy in motherhood. Things like never-ending messes, tantrums, angry outbursts, and fatigue overwhelm you. Your heart is heavy perpetually.

You just feel like something is broken.

Joy in motherhood is a funny thing. Motherhood is wearying, and yet there are those precious moments. Those moments however aren’t why motherhood can be joyful.

In fact, these precious moments are empty if we don’t cherish the one thing that brings true hope and true joy to our mothering.

True joy cannot be had in motherhood apart from the Jesus, His cross, and His resurrection. Without the cross, our children don’t have the hope of God’s forgiveness or strength. Without the cross or the resurrection our children have no hope of Heaven.

Without Christ, our children have no hope of a life filled with purpose.

All the Eskimo kisses, hugs, and cuddles in the world can’t bring true joy. True joy in motherhood begins because Christ came to save, Christ came to bring peace, and Christ came so we and our children can live life more abundantly.

I know what true joy is because I’ve felt it. Holding a baby isn’t true joy, but in the words of Bill Gaither, holding a child and knowing “He can face uncertain days, because He Lives” does hold true joy.

I can’t imagine being a mother not having the assurance that my Jesus lives. Life would be empty, and all those tender moments would ultimately be pointless.

When we peel back the surface, every moment of motherhood: the happy, the stressed, the fatigued,

blessedtoknow the animated, the agitated, and the content; every moment contains joy. Every moment can contain joy because that joy always comes from the hope that Christ brings us.

The only hope for true joy in motherhood is found in Christ and Christ alone. If you are struggling to find joy in parenting, rest assured our Lord and Savior is close, and it is because of Him and His sacrifice that we can treasure each moment and memory.

Joy doesn’t need to be an outward display unbridled ecstasy though. Our joy begins
I like to think of the special moments in motherhood as tiny glimpses of heaven. The snuggles, the giggles, and the little blessings, are a shadow of the amazing joy that is to come if our faith rests in Christ. That is the true joy of motherhood.with the peace that the Lord holds our children’s and our futures in His hands. Our joy is in knowing the promises that hold true in our lives will hold true in our children’s as well.

What are some ways you have struggled to find joy in motherhood?

KM Logan is a wife, mother, teacher, and author. She is wholly inadequate but strengthened by the Lord. She’d be tickled pink if you stopped by her blog and said hi.

Filed Under: Guest Posts, Mothering

Throwing Off the Yoke

March 19, 2013 by Christin 9 Comments

Most days I really feel the weight of my own failures. Nothing major, so to speak. Just all the little things that add up. Such as not getting out of bed early so I can begin my day well. Or failing to read the Bible to my children–or myself. And going to bed with the house a wreck because I failed to keep on top of it throughout the day. In the midst of my own frustrations, of course I snap at my children several times throughout the day.

By the end of the night I wonder, “Is this really what life is about?”

Am I to live each day by the measure of my own failures and place my joy in that? Because if that is the case, my life will be lacking joy.

I breathe in deep and exhale the heaviness of my own yoke. I’ve bound myself to something Christ has freed me from; sin.

Sin is something I cannot help. That’s why God sent Jesus, right? Sin is so ingrained in my being, there is nothing I can do to get rid of it.

And I have a choice. I can choose to believe God’s word when it says,

Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us. Galatians 3:13

and

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1

Does this mean I can just act careless and do whatever I want? No, not at all.

You were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature, rather, serve one another in love. Galatians 5:13

Indulging is a more intentional act of gratifying or satisfying the flesh. When I walk with Christ and I focus on my relationship with Him, it automatically pours out into my life because the Spirit lives within me. But when I try to do things backwards and toil over obeying the “law”, as it were, and I miss walking with Christ, I’ve missed the point.

I find myself having these conversations regularly. Because I forget and need to remind myself consistently.

I plan to write a bit more on my imperfect ponderings into my daily life. Sometimes it really helps to figure things out when I write it down. I don’t have all the answers and maybe writing that down will remind me to chase after the One who does.

Tonight, I am shifting my thinking away from tomorrow’s to-do list and of all the methods I have in my head to “get it right”, and I’m just going to focus on Christ and be lead by the Spirit. I want to love well so that I may live well. I don’t want to try to perform well and lose my joy, because I’ll never live up to the standard of getting it right.

And that’s OK with Jesus.

Linked with Titus 2uesday.

Filed Under: Daily Life

What I’m Reading This Month {March}

March 18, 2013 by Christin 11 Comments

These are the books I’ve been digging into this month:

More or Less

This book makes you rethink how much is enough. What could we do with the access that we have when there are people around us in need? There is no formula for this as each person needs to be lead by God and decide within their own lifestyle. No judgement. Just a challenge for those with more to consider living with less by being in tune with the needs of those around us. I know I am one who has more.

To Walk or Stay

My sweet friend Lara Williams opens her heart with the world and shares about the struggles her marriage faced and how God redeemed what the world, even the Christian world, would have deemed as hopeless or “not worth it”. She shares the raw, the honest, the ugly. Whether you struggle in your marriage or not, this testimony is a beautiful working of God’s grace among ashes. He is the God of restoration and He uses Lara’s story to speak into my own life and marriage. I couldn’t recommend this book enough. In an age and society when divorce is at an all time high, we need to take a deeper look and fight for our marriages.

Abundant Simplicity

This is a powerful book about taking a serious look into our lives and being honest about our own self-indulgence. We all have it and always will, to some degree, on this earth. But what can we do today to say “No” to something we want for something greater? Over time we can form habits of denying ourselves something we want. For what? What’s the point? We begin to see a bigger picture when we’re not drowning in selfish desires which can often play into our self-worth.

What are you reading this month?

This post contains affiliate links.

Filed Under: Resources

Joyful Mothering

What I’m Reading This Month (April)

Still finishing…

eBooks

When the Ground is Dry

God Uses the Inadequate

The Incredible Privilege of a Mother

Raising Children in a Changing Culture

Inviting Our Children Into Our Journey

Battling the Gimmies: Raising Financially Responsible Children

Give, Save, Spend

The Joy of Motherhood is in the Cross

You just feel like something is broken.

Throwing Off the Yoke

What I’m Reading This Month {March}

More or Less

To Walk or Stay

Abundant Simplicity

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