I love how Amy subtitled this chapter: “I’m a homemaker but my name ain’t Susie”.

Back when I had one child, I almost felt like Susie “Homemaker”. Seriously. I thought I had it all together. Our second child put reality into perspective for me; not merely because I had two children, but my second child was born with major food allergies and asthma. It put me on a road I never expected. And although he has been healed of most of those ailments (and is now 6 years old), I now have a total of five children. Susie left a loong time ago.

In recent months I have come to learn something about myself. Maybe this is true of you as well, but you just haven’t realized it yet.

I like to keep things simple. I have always been like that, but it’s become more intentional in recent months and I have further justification for choosing this lifestyle.

I do not want to waste my life constantly reorganizing my “stuff” to make it more manageable.

I would rather spend my time creating with my children, reading to them, writing, and helping others. So I have learned to simplify everything; from toys to clothes, books and furniture, decor and nick knacks. Everything. I keep the best of everything and let the rest go. It really helps me breathe and makes managing my home easier and allows me for more time with my family, and to be quite honest, for blogging, too.

Amy leaves you with some wonderful ideas on how to help manage your home.

What is something you can work on this week to help better manage your home?

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This blog is centered around raising our children in the Lord. We have a mission field right in our own homes. Children being born into a Christian family doesn’t secure their salvation. Perfect parenting doesn’t secure their salvation either.

Only Jesus secures their salvation. Our responsibility is to lead them to the cross; lead them to the throne of grace. We can’t change their hearts and we can’t whip them into shape. But we can guide them and love them until there’s nothing left and rely on Jesus to keep loving them.

What we can do is love them so deeply it drives them to Jesus; not constantly bash them for making mistakes or being childish, because they will mature as we continue to guide. Guiding them means being intentional about what we’re doing and teaching every.single.day. Not just once in a while pulling out the Bible because we feel guilty we haven’t in a month. That’s a harsh reality to be faced with, but friends, what are we compromising when we don’t make Him a priority right in front of our children?

My goal isn’t to take the soapbox today, however. Amy has some things to share with you so I’ll give her the floor.

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The winner of Grace for the Good Girl is commenter #4, Alison. Congrat’s Alison!

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This was one of my favorite chapters in Amy’s book. I love how she opens the chapter with Mark 10:9 and offers an insight I had never considered before.

Many people get married believing their wedding day is a “sealer” or guarantee of some sort that everything will  be great. The truth is, when you have two sinners living under one roof, this is simply not the case. Disagreements and hard times will come.

Many things need to be considered and we should always be proactive in our marriage. Last week I wrote about a few things that I have found vital for the health of my own marriage.

There is something even more vital that comes before all of that can even happen.

Your love for God.

Excellent thoughts here Amy. Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us.

I love all the feedback in the comments from last week and I have read every single one of them. It takes courage to recognize areas we fall short in and I commend you ladies for that.

This week I want to challenge you to seek God and pray that He would mold your heart to be receptive to Him. Pull out a journal and write down your prayers if it will help you focus. Do not neglect your time with God because it ultimately effects everything else, including your marriage. God must, must, must be the center of everything.

This week’s giveaway is for the book:

Grace for the Good Girl by Emily P. Freeman

Today, let’s discuss what is hindering us from being diligent to seek out time with God daily. This time is crucial for us to grow in our walk with the Lord and also in our marriages. The two are intertwined. Our marriage cannot grow if our relationship with God lacks, is strained, or isn’t regularly nurtured.

In order for your entry to count for the giveaway, you must add meaningful discussion in the comments.

Last weeks eBook winners are:

Motherhicks and Vickie

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Welcome to week 4 of our Pursuit of Proverbs 31 study. In an attempt to rally some of you back in to the study, we’re going to be offering a giveaway at the bottom of this post, so stay tuned!

I know sometimes when we get behind on a study we can feel like we’ve failed and just give up attempting to get back on board. Don’t do this! It’s better to jump in where we are at then to just give up the whole study altogether. You can always go back to those chapters, and visit the series here to watch the videos at any time. Let’s just keep moving forward and not worry about what we left behind. Nothing’s perfect, right? Let’s make the most of it!

Today we’re touching on being a wife and help meet to our husbands. Amy makes some excellent points in this section, so if you don’t own a copy, get it here!

Here are some of my thoughts and experience.

Your relationship with your husband should be first priority under your relationship with God.

Having a good foundation in your marriage sets a good foundation for your children. Having a good foundation with God sets a good foundation for your marriage {which perhaps I could have mentioned first}.

Children need to see their mama respect, support, and love their daddy unconditionally. Not only when you think he deserves it or only after you get your needs met, but simply because you want to show love to him. Which I know can be so hard when it’s not a lifestyle you grew into in the beginning of your marriage. But nothing is hopeless and I have heard of countless marriages transformed just by having transformed thinking.

We must remember the design for marriage God has given us — He’s given it to us for our good.

Here are some key elements that I have found imperative for the health of my marriage:

Communication & Prayer

When my husband and I don’t communicate well, it can lead to major frustrations and a sense of insignificance. However, getting to know my husband has helped me understand how he works, and as a result of this, I know he doesn’t do things to intentionally make me angry.

For example, when he’s running late (really late) from work and doesn’t call to let me know, and I try calling him and get no answer. I used to get so irritated at this because I would worry! Often, he doesn’t even realize the time because he is so deep in his work, trying to get it finished so he can come home. Since I have come to understand this, it’s easier to set my mind at ease. That doesn’t mean we’ll always understand everything our husband does, but we can still show understanding and grace.

I also pray for my husband, in general and specifically. Two weeks ago he hurt his back at work and was on work restrictions because he couldn’t lift or bend much. I specifically prayed and I asked my Good Morning Girls group to pray as well. He is almost 100% better now, doing his full work load again. Our husbands need our prayers! But please, mind your prayers. Certainly it’s important that our husband’s grow in the Lord, but don’t allow your prayer life to become a list of complaints against all the things your husband isn’t doing right. And certainly don’t ask your girlfriends to pray for all his “wrongs”. That would shame your husband. Yea, don’t do that.

Love & Respect

These are probably the two most important factors in marriage. Husbands are to love their wives, and wives are to respect their husbands. Obviously, we also should love our husbands and they should respect us. But isn’t it powerful how God knew what a man and a woman would need? Women need to feel loved and men need to know they are respected–especially by their wife.

I never had an all out desire to purposefully disrespect or dishonor my husband. Rather, there are little things that I had to learn that were disrespectful to him–and I’m still learning. For example, a big pet peeve of his is when I correct his disciplinary action of the children, in front of the children.

It used to be a really bad habit that was hard to break. Sometimes I just  felt the need to come to their defense if he didn’t know the whole story or if I thought the discipline didn’t fit the “crime”. However, that doesn’t justify my disrespectful behavior in front of the children. This is where communication is SO vital. My husband was wise in telling me this bothered him, rather then letting it stew and me never knowing about it.

Forgiveness & Unity

These are also very important elements in our marriage. When my husband and I get into a nasty fight, which are really rare, but they do happen. It hurts. I have a mix of anger and pain. Because although I might be angry with him, I am also hurting from being in disunity from him. We are a team. So when there is a disconnect, I feel that divide. These are the times when I really pray. I pray for God to work in both our hearts.

Regardless of who’s right or wrong, I apologize. Because if my husband is angry or hurt or upset, it means that my actions have caused those feelings. I’m not the one feeling them, so I cannot say what he should or shouldn’t feel based on my actions. The simple fact is, my actions wronged him in some way. So I apologize. Unity with my husband is much more important than who was right or who was wrong.

Ladies, we want to challenge you this week. What can you do to make your husband feel respected by you? Is there a specific area you fall short in? Do you struggle overall? Choose one thing, pray for God’s direction, and work toward it this week.

 Giveaway

We’re keeping this simple. Whoever adds meaningful comment discussion will automatically be entered for one featured eBook of winners choice. There will be two ladies chosen.

Featured eBooks

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Welcome to week 3 of the Pursuit of Proverbs 31 study. I do hope you have had a chance to watch Amy’s previous videos and shift some thinking in these last couple of weeks. If not, that’s OK! Sometimes it takes time to change mindsets we’ve lived for so long. Just keep renewing your mind with God’s truth. Replace the false ideas with the reality of God’s word.

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I just want to echo Amy — your relationship with Christ should be the center of everything. He needs to be in every aspect of our lives. I once heard someone say that some people “over spiritualize everything” in response to learning of someone praying whether or not to homeschool. Honestly, unless we’re talking fruit loop faith where we try to over think things or over analyze them into being something they’re not. That’s not what I mean.

What I mean is simply including God, inviting Him in, to everything and every decision. There is certainly no way to “over spiritualize” your life with “too much God”. It’s just not possible. The more we seek Him, the more we want to know Him.

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The Series

Week 1 - The Myths {of the Proverbs 31 Woman}

Week 2 – Will the Real YOU Please Stand UP {Chapter 2}

Amy blogs at Cajun Joie de Vivre

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